Office Holiday Party Etiquette: Plus-Ones, Alcohol, Remote Staff
Who gets a plus-one, how to handle alcohol, and how to include remote teammates without making the party feel split in two.
You have been asked to plan the office holiday party, and the guest list questions started before you even picked a venue. Do plus-ones come. Is there an open bar. What happens to the six people who work from another state and will never see the venue in person.
None of these are etiquette problems in the usual sense. They are logistics problems wearing an etiquette costume, and most of them have a workable default answer that keeps the party fair without turning you into HR.
Decide the plus-one policy before you send anything
Plus-ones are usually the first fight, mostly because nobody decided the rule out loud. Pick one of these approaches and state it on the invitation itself, not in a follow-up email people may not read.
- Employees only. Common for smaller teams, tight budgets, or parties held during work hours.
- Employees plus spouses or partners. Common for evening or weekend parties meant to double as a thank-you to families.
- Employees plus one guest, any guest. Most flexible, most expensive, and hardest to headcount accurately.
- No policy stated. Avoid this. It produces uneven groups and quiet resentment.
Whichever you choose, say it plainly: "This invitation is for employees only" or "Feel free to bring your spouse or partner." A corporate event invitation with a clear line like that gets fewer confused replies than one that leaves guests to guess.
A rule of thumb for mixed seniority
If leadership brings spouses, offer the same option company-wide. A policy that applies to executives but not to everyone else reads as a hierarchy, even if that was never the intent.
Set an alcohol policy that matches your company, not your personal preference
There is no universal right answer here — it depends on your company's culture, your budget, whether the party is on a workday, and whether attendance is effectively mandatory. What matters is that the policy is decided in advance and communicated, not improvised at the bar.
- Full open bar, no limit. Works for evening, off-site parties where guests can arrange their own ride home.
- Drink tickets, typically two to four per person. A common middle ground that controls both cost and overconsumption.
- Beer and wine only, no spirits. Lowers cost and lowers risk without going fully dry.
- Dry event. Common for daytime office parties, companies with a no-alcohol culture, or when minors or clients attend.
If you serve alcohol, plan a way home: a known-early cutoff time, a taxi or rideshare code, or simply ending the party early enough that public transit is still running. This is not legal advice, just the practical piece that prevents the awkward part of the night.
For food and drink quantities once you know the policy, the party food calculator turns your guest count into per-person amounts so you are not guessing on order day.
Include remote teammates without making it an afterthought
If part of the team is remote, decide early whether the party is in-person only, hybrid, or two separate events. All three are legitimate. What causes hurt feelings is remote staff finding out about the party from photos afterward.
- In-person only, remote staff informed. Send a note explaining the format and, if the budget allows, a small gift or stipend so remote employees feel included in the spirit of the day.
- Hybrid with a video call segment. Works for toasts, awards, or a gift reveal, but keep it short — a video call bolted onto a live party rarely holds anyone's attention for long.
- Two separate parties. A local event and a remote-team event, planned as equals rather than one being the "real" party and the other a consolation.
Whatever you choose, put it in the invitation wording itself: "This year's party is in-office only; remote team members will receive a separate gift and virtual toast in December." Naming the plan removes the guesswork that turns into hurt feelings later. The corporate event wording examples page has more phrasing for exactly this kind of announcement.
Track RSVPs so the numbers actually work
Office parties fail on logistics more often than on etiquette — too much food, too little, a room booked for forty when sixty show up. A few habits fix this.
- Send the invitation with a firm RSVP deadline, generally 10 to 14 days before the event for an office-sized group. The RSVP deadline calculator will work backward from your date if you are unsure.
- Ask party size directly on the RSVP form, separating employee from guest so you know exactly who is attending, not just a headcount.
- Send one reminder to anyone who has not replied within a few days of the deadline, rather than emailing the whole company again.
- Close the list at the deadline and confirm final numbers with your caterer or venue 3 to 5 days out.
An evite built for this makes the tracking part easier: publishing costs $1.99 once, includes unlimited RSVPs, and email invites are free, so you are not paying per reply as the list grows. You can message just the people who have not responded instead of the whole distribution list, which keeps the reminders from feeling like nagging.
Sample wording that covers the tricky parts in one line
A short invitation can quietly answer plus-one, alcohol, and dress code questions before anyone has to ask.
You're invited to our annual Holiday Party — Friday, December 12, 6:30 to 9:30 PM at [venue]. This year's celebration is for employees and one guest. Beer, wine and a full dinner will be served; a rideshare code will be provided at checkout. Cocktail attire. Please RSVP by December 1 so we can finalize the headcount.
Notice what that wording does: it states the plus-one policy, the alcohol plan, the dress code, and the deadline, all without sounding like a memo. Guests read it once and know exactly what to expect.
A word on budget and company size
A twelve-person startup and a four-hundred-person company are not planning the same party, and the etiquette above should flex accordingly. Smaller teams can often afford an open bar and a plus-one for everyone; larger companies may need drink tickets and an employees-only policy just to keep costs sane. Neither approach is more correct — match the policy to what you can actually deliver without surprises on the night.
Frequently asked questions
Should the office holiday party be during work hours or after?
Both are common. Daytime parties tend to be alcohol-light and more inclusive of employees who cannot stay late; evening parties allow a fuller event with alcohol and spouses. Match the timing to your alcohol policy and plus-one decision so they reinforce each other.
Is it rude to have an employees-only party with no plus-ones?
No. It is a common and reasonable choice, especially for smaller budgets or daytime events. The key is stating it clearly on the invitation so no one assumes otherwise and shows up with an uninvited guest.
How do I handle remote employees who feel left out of the in-person party?
Acknowledge the gap directly rather than ignoring it: explain the format in advance, and consider a separate virtual gathering, a stipend, or a small gift shipped to remote staff around the same time as the in-person event.
What's a reasonable RSVP deadline for an office party?
About 10 to 14 days before the event works for most office-sized groups, giving you time to confirm final numbers with caterers or venues. Larger companies may need closer to three weeks to account for slower replies across departments.
Who pays for plus-ones at a company holiday party?
The company typically covers the cost for whichever plus-one policy it sets, whether that's spouses only or one guest per employee. If budget is tight, an employees-only policy avoids the cost question entirely rather than asking guests to pay their own way in.
